Let Me Tell You About My Greenwich

Let me tell you about my Greenwich:

1. Lots to see and lots to do.
2. Is home to the National Maritime Museum, Naval College and the Cutty Sark (to name a few).
3. Although it's in the city, it has a sense of being a quiet village where everybody seems to know each other. Friendly smiles and salutations all around. Great for raising children. Neighbours all know and like one another.
4. Great shopping to be had from local stores and shops.
5. Very progressive and environmentally friendly. Claims that it's one of the best recycling boroughs around. Beat that.
6. Excellent primary schools.
7. Most of our youth are either into sports (swimming and football) or doing community work (source: based on what you read in Greenwich Time)

Let me tell you about my Greenwich:

1. Lots to see and lots to do.
2. It's home to the deft pick pocket and host to the noisy littering drunken visitors who make it (or at least try to make it) their life's mission to damage as much of the national treasures as possible.
3. Barely know the neighbours. All the better from the look of matters. I'm calling the police. Kids do not go out unsupervised.
4. High rent flushing local businesses out of the area.
5. Thanks to the new waste collection scheme, there seems to be more rubbish outside the bins than inside them.
6. Who are we kidding? In truth, it's just one primary school that counts and the rest are trying to catch up. What secondary school?
7. Youth? what youth? they're either too drunk or too pregnant. Call the police!